A: Two in front and two in back

Q: What game do four elephants in a Mini play?

A: Squash

Q: How do you get an elephant into the fridge?

A: Open the door, insert the elephant, close the door

Q: How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?

A: Open the door, take out the elephant, insert the giraffe, close the door

Q: The lion decided to have a party. All of the other animals showed up except for one. Which animal did not show up?

A: The giraffe because he was stuck in the fridge

Q: How do you know if there are two elephants in the fridge?

A: The door won’t close

Q: How do you know if there are three elephants in the fridge?

A: There will be one elephant waiting in the Mini

I freakin’ love elephant jokes!

1. I walked in to the men’s room at $LOCAL_GROCER–a 1 and 1 set up. There was a pair of legs visible under the stall wall and the urinal was empty. The odd thing? The stall door was wide open and there was weird grunting coming from the other side of the wall. I did not tarry.
2. The brewing room smells marvy what with a Belgian Wit, Nut Brown, and Gooseberry wine all burbling away.
3. While WIX v3.6 is pretty much awesome when looked at from the perspective of WIX v3.0, it is still Windows Installer we’re dealing with. Which sucks.
4. Being the mayor of places on Foursquare creates more obligations than one might expect. Well losing a mayorship makes one more inclined to visit a place than one might normally be. Why is it important to be mayor of the Bag ‘n’ Save? Especially when I cannot do anything about grunty open stall? I do not know.
5. Rick Santorum headlines are pretty much always unintentionally funny these days.

• 96 ounces of gooseberries
• 4 gallons of water
• 12 pounds of cane sugar
• 1.5 teaspoons of acid blend
• 4 teaspoons of yeast nutrient
• 2 teaspoons of pectin enzyme
• 1/2 teaspoon of tanin
• 4 crushed Campden tablets

Initially we put in 10 pounds of sugar but the specific gravity was a paltry 1.060. We wanted something a little more wine-like so decided to add another pound. Then we did a silly thing and threw in the twelfth pound too. That might make a 15% ABV wine. Yikes!

The plan for now is to rack it at 1.060 and then let it get down to about 1.030 or so. If we hit that target we will rack it again and add the potassium sorbate to halt the alcohol production. Hopefully we’ll end up with a flavorful, slightly sweet dessert wine that does not overpower with a high ABV.

Getting back to what we did. The must sat overnight and got up to pitching temperature. Saturday morning we pitched one packet of Red Star Pasteur Red active wine yeast. By tonight we’ve got some pretty high velocity fermentation going. I popped the lid to stir (suggested by the recipe…something I’m not sure we should be doing) and take a specific gravity reading. We’re down to 1.100 already. Looking to rack it Thursday or Friday night at this rate.

Initial readings

• Mixed in fermenter: 16 December, 2011
• Yeast pitched: 17 December, 2011
• Must temperature: 72°F
• OG: 1.111
• Potential ABV: 15%

For completeness’ sake, here’s the full recipe:
96 ounce can of gooseberries
4 gallons water
12 lbs sugar
2 tsp Acid Blend
4 tsp Yeast Nutrient
2 tsp pectin enzyme
1/2 tsp tanin
4 crushed Campden tablets
1 packet wine yeast
2 1/2 tsp potasium sorbate

1. Put gooseberries in muslin bag and tie off
2. Add all ingredients except for the yeast and potassium sorbate to the fermenter and mix well
3. Cover with damp cloth and let sit overnight (we’re just lidding the bucket with an airlock)
4. The next day sprinkle yeast on top of the must and reseal bucket
5. Check specific gravity of must daily and gently stir so as to not disturb lees
6. When SG reaches 1.040 (we’re going to shoot for 1.060) strain fruit bag and rack to carboy
7. Rack again when SG reaches 1.030 and add potasium sorbate and four crushed Campden tablets
8. After wine clears (2 – 3 months) bottle. Wine is drinkable at this point but could do with another 6 months or so in cellar before drinking.

It must be Bottling Day tomorrow. Either that or I’ve washed and de-labelled a few dozen+ wine bottles for no reason.

Went downstairs and talked to the wine tonight. She’s as ready as we are.

It is no wonder that I enjoy both.

First attempt at mocking up a label for our little winery. Still some cleaning up and aligning to do but not bad for a few hours of work if I say so myself.

This brings us to a task I’ve been punting for a while now. Somehow we need to scavenge, scrounge, or rustle up about three dozen 750ml wine bottles in the next two weeks. You have any we can use? Quite likely some percentage of your empties will be returned to you in a much less empty state…just in time for the holidays.